It’s true. Everything must go! Including my need, apparently, never to f*cking blink. I blame the caffeine. And the crack. Just kidding! Crack is wack. You know what’s not wack, though? Buying my stuff so I’ll have vino money in Chile.
It’s true. Everything must go! Including my need, apparently, never to f*cking blink. I blame the caffeine. And the crack. Just kidding! Crack is wack. You know what’s not wack, though? Buying my stuff so I’ll have vino money in Chile.
Marissa Payne 
You losing it. Can I have the canned food? Why Chile
Oh Anesh, I lost it long, long ago!
The canned food is NOT for sale. I repeat, the canned food is NOT for sale.
Why Chile? Several reasons. But mainly, I’ve always wanted to go there. Lovely nature there.
BS
BS = Bean Situation, right? I am happy to report the BS is totally under control.
Dibbs on the Beavis and Butthead mugs!
Unfortunately, it’s not mugs but one single mug. But hey, it’s still something!
LOL….how much for the plants? 🙂 That vlog was hilarious!
I think my vlogging is aided by having stayed up all night singing karaoke in NYC then hopping on a bus home where I stayed awake by eating copious amounts of sugar and caffeine. I probably won’t sleep for the next couple of days…
Oh snap! The plants, we’ll say, $2 for both? I’ll even throw in the 7UP bottle I use as a watering vessel.
we need more weird chicks like you in dc
Trust me, I would love more weird chicks and dudes in DC.
What shows off our age of excess — we all just have too much _stuff_, and try to get rid of it whenever we can.
Seventy years ago, this wasn’t so.
Ridiculous amounts of stuff even the poor among us have…
Excellent point. I’m not throwing everything out. I’m definitely keeping art, pictures, most books and other sentimental garbage, but as far as all the furniture, save for an antique chest I inherited from my grandma, all the other pieces aren’t worth moving. I wish it was easier to rent affordable furnished places in the USA…
Oh, sure. Those are irreplaceable. But the mass of furniture — it could all be gone and replaced with similar stuff, and it wouldn’t matter.
I couldn’t watch the blog the whole way through — your eyes frightened me. That shade of blue…
Good luck with the fire sale. (And of course, if you can’t sell it, don’t hesitate to actually light a fire, burn your apartment down, and let your insurance company cut you a check.)
The primary reason I don’t up and move to Chile* is because of the vast amount of crap I’ve accumulated over the years and don’t want to let go of, so I admire your ability to let it all go.
* Well…not Chile. But substitute any one of a number of American cities with creature comforts like a public transportation system, take-out Chinese on every block, and central heating, and there you go.
Scotus, you always have plan. I like it. As far as letting go of my crap…yeah, for some reason i’ve never had a problem with it. Maybe its because I have terrible taste…
Regarding the bed, are there any, um, beanlove stains?
My God, of course not! Those cans don’t leak. (Double entendre time!)
You should have had Tobias Fünke audition for your commecial:
OH MY GOD! WE’RE HAVING A FIRE…sale…OH! THE BURNING!
Tobias and I have a lot in common. If only he 1) existed in real life and 2) lived in DC to star in my vlogs…Life would be perfect then.
Thanks for that. CLASSIC!
Just awesome. But I weep for Baguette… if you don’t find her a go home, consider a tax-deductible donation to Phoenix Bikes or Bikes for the World.
I, too, weep for Baguette. I’m hoping to find her a good home. Mostly because she’s one of the few items I own that is probably worth something, even if not much. But yeah, I have a growing donation pile for sure.
Also, I’m planning to go for a mountain bike in Chile. Never really done that before. Completely pumped for it though.
I meant to write “good home,” but if you find her a “go home” that may also be nice.
Marissa, just want to say that I’ve been loving your blog for awhile as it’s the most consistently amusing one in DC. Can’t help but to look forward to your take on the ‘retarded’ world outside the beltway. Best on your adventure and hope someone pays you to blog because you write the funniest stuff around.
Wow, thanks! I’m also really excited to expand my repertoire beyond the Beltway. The Anti DC was good, but this is going to be so much better. I hope, at least! Now as far as getting paid…that shit would be tight…
I’ll give you $6 for both of those plants!
Oh man…this is the best offer yet!
have you seen auto tune the news? it’s on you tube. i think you should consider taking your next vlog in that direction. btw set aside a good half hour to enjoy the series, they are hilarious!
I LOVE autotune news! I’ve only seen one episode but I remember laughing hysterically. Must…watch…more…now…!